Jones and Brown

Suzie, I don't want to lose you tonight.

2010-07-21T19:54:00.000-07:00

Bud AKA “Bud” is a self loathing paranoid schizophrenic who although independently wealthy can frequently be found panhandling on the corner of Main Street and South Temple. Bud frequently trips and falls on the train just like he fell for Suzie, hard. Deceived by her sinister aura, Bud quickly emptied his pockets and gave all he had to the dirty whore. She in turn just asked for more. Fearing that Suzie might leave him, Bud collaborated with singing sensation Jan Terri to write and perform “I don’t want to lose you tonight.” Bud, like the song, became a big loser. Bud and Suzie were like a merry-go-round turning in circles. When he thought she was telling the truth she was telling lies. Finding himself unable to cope with the pain and green with jealous rage, Bud did the unthinkable. He picked up the phone and called Bruce…

Bad, real bad

2010-05-05T19:38:00.000-07:00

Al and I recently became acutely aware of a growing problem on our state’s public transportation system. A problem so vile that it threatens to tear apart the very fibers that weave UTA's pants together. The problem I speak of is named Suzie (AKA the Floozy). On the outside Suzie is a very mild mannered average woman in her mid to late 20’s who sells annuities and rides TRAX in the mornings. But on the inside she is an evil women, who is hell bent on destroying the salvation and retirement accounts of the elderly. Al and I have uncovered circumstantial evidence that could indicate that Suzie might be seducing elderly men who may have millions of dollars that she might also be stealing.

The two victims identified so far are Gus and Bud (AKA the Clients). Gus, a 65 year old male, is a grounds keeper at a local baseball field. Until recently Gus was a married grandfather of 12. He enjoyed reading, baseball and taxidermy. He volunteered at the homeless shelter and always carried a smile. That smile turned to a frown the minute Suzie lied to him about everything and stole all of his money, dead animals and his soul. Suzie is bad, real bad and must be stopped. More to come shortly...

Low and Slow...

2010-05-04T11:30:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday I took advantage of my time at home by practicing one of my all-time favorite hobbies...BBQ!

I smoked some St. Louis style ribs which, by BBQ standards, is a short cook (it only took 6 hours).

I love BBQ-ing for several reasons. Who can argue that treating an otherwise tough cut of meat with a little TLC, thereby producing some of the most tender, flavorful food known to man is a worthwhile endeavor? It's a great excuse to gather family and friends and create memories...all while enjoying good food.

I must admit though - my intentions with BBQ aren't wholly selfless. I love using my time tending the smoker to enjoy the beautiful weather and smell the wonderful aromas. There's something special about just sitting and watching the smoke billow from the smoke stack, not "having" to think about any particular topic, forgetting about problems at work, and watching the kids play in the backyard while they insist they're "helping Daddy".

I guess I can sum it all up by saying that I really just love being able to live a short portion of life exactly how great BBQ is supposed to be cooked - Low and Slow.

Here's to hoping that we can all find time in our busy lives to step back and enjoy a hobby or two!

Mr. Cool-Lo Brown

My Feet

2010-03-22T21:57:00.001-07:00

From this point forward there will be periodic postings on this blog which will display pictures of my feet/foot in new locations. This will not be set on any particular schedule, but will be added as time and opportunity allow.

I'm doing this for the benefit of the readers because, let's face it...my feet are pretty spectacular.

This first picture shows my foot on a beach in Encinitas, Ca. You'll notice that my foot is strategically placed next to the foot print of a Seagull. This is a remarkable photo

Enjoy!

M. Russell Ballard

2010-03-20T13:56:00.001-07:00

It may not always be easy, convenient, or politically correct to stand for truth and right, but it is always the right thing to do. Always

Masters of BBQ!

2010-03-18T21:47:00.001-07:00

If you haven't had BCQ, you haven't had BBQ!

Stickers On Your Hard Hat?!

2010-03-15T18:16:00.001-07:00

I'm working downtown next to one of the largest construction projects underway in America. As a result of this fact, I frequently see construction workers walking around with their hard hats and other protective gear on. Many of the hard hats these workers wear are covered with stickers...I'm talking plastered!

Now, I know that job sites often require you to attend a 'job site safety' course before you're allowed to actually work on the job. Upon completion of this orientation you're issued a sticker with a number on it. and you're told to wear it on your brain bucket. This way, if you violate any job site safety rules and get caught, your hat number can be referenced and they'll know who you are...however you're dealt with depends on the severity of your offense.

In the industry it's a sign of being seasoned when your hat has a large number of job stickers (even more impressive is when you've got stickers from specialized, large scale jobs from all around the nation).

My gripe is when these workers (mainly talking about the guys working outside my window) grab any and all stickers they can get their hands on and slap them on their hat in some weird attempt to 'appear' like something they're not. I've seen guys running around with stickers promoting radio stations, energy drinks, sports teams, rock bands, etc.

You're probably thinking "Yeah, yeah, yeah....So What?! Who cares if a guy wants to turn his hat into a portable bill board?! What does it matter?".

My response: Well, it really doesn't matter much at all.

Mr. Cool Lo Brown

The Proper Role Of Government

2010-03-11T22:31:00.000-08:00

Recently I read an exchange of ideas on a popular social networking site pertaining to the hot and heavy health care debate being waged currently in our country.

There was one individual who was staunchly arguing that the role of government is precisely to regulate in matters such as these. He said:

"What is wrong with the government setting up regulations? Most people don't seem to mind when the government makes laws about murder, crime, rape or other things criminals like to do. Your government is there to protect you."

Without bringing up the glaring differences which exist between laws protecting inalienable rights such as life (protection from being murdered) compared to privileges such as health care, I submitted one post which has been inserted below:

"I don’t want to write a novel or hijack this thread, but let me just say that your view on the proper role of government is inaccurate to say the least Sean.

After having read your posts, it seems that you think the proper role of government is to ensure justice reigns. This might seem fine at first glance but this proactive approach can’t exist without infringing on the very liberties our government has been established to protect. The correct and proper role of government is to prevent injustice from reigning. By preventing injustice from reigning, our liberty remains untouched by a potentially tyrannical government. For a more complete study on this topic, I suggest you read “The Law” by Frederic Bastiat (a Frenchman from the mid 1800’s with a profound respect for America).

What is being proposed currently regarding health care WILL rob us (citizens) of our hard earned property (money) by forcing us to pay for a plan that the majority of us (according to every major poll I have seen) does not wish to have established.

“Reaching into one's own pockets to assist his fellow man in need is praiseworthy and laudable. Reaching into someone else’s pockets to do so is despicable and deserves condemnation.” –Walter E. Williams

Feel free to give me any feedback you might have on my comment. Before being too harsh, keep in mind that I made the post quite late at night and therefore had to spew it out rather hastily! I did feel the need to say something nonetheless.

Thanks,

Mr. Cool Lo Brown

China: Cooperation, or confrontation.

2009-07-30T15:27:00.000-07:00

Earlier this week 150 Chinese diplomats where hosted by Tim Geithner and Hillary Clinton in an attempt to resolve concerns about the state of our nation’s economy. Following the talks President Obama issued the statement, “Cooperation, not confrontation” referring to the future of the United States relationship with China.

The relationship between the United States and China will undoubtedly reshape the global economy, and if not handled correctly could have devastating impacts on the future of society as we know it.

China is currently the largest foreign holder of U.S Treasury Debt in the world, holding more than $1 Trillion in U.S. Treasury securities and other U.S. government bonds. Never before has the U.S. been so heavily financed by a foreign country. Some criticize China’s poor monetary policy while others believe that the U.S. is secretly plotting to destroy the Chinese economy. In March of 2009 Forbes Magazine reported, “If you owe China $1 billion, it's your problem. If you owe China $1 trillion, it's China's problem.

A more accurate statement would be, “If you owe China $1 billion, it's your problem. If you owe China $1 trillion, it's your problem.”

Based on what we know about china, do we really think that this is going to end well?

BCQ's award winning BBQ!

2009-06-08T11:49:00.000-07:00

Chicken and Ribs anyone?!

BCQ is pleased to announce success in its first ever competition BBQ cookoff!

Third place overall (2nd place in Chicken and 3rd place in Ribs) and proud of it!

When we arrived on site and began setting up our gear, most of the other teams came by and snickered a little bit. They had to have a good little laugh at our 8 year old charcoal grill we got on clearance for $20 and at our four year old "baby" smoker that fits two racks of ribs nice and snug...But they weren't laughing when they got to taste the "Q" we were able to produce with it!

For the chicken we chose to do full legs. These were some beauties too! We gave them a good rub down with our special BCQ Chicky Rub and then smoked them with cherry wood for a good couple hours...just enough to get the smoke in the meat. Once the smoke had been adequately applied, we finished them off on the grill with the occasional mop of the "Top Secret" BCQ BBQ Sauce. This is the REAL "finger lickin' good" chicken folks. No doubt!

We chose Baby Backs for the rib category and they didn't let us down. We started them off with our BCQ Big Time Rub and threw them in the smoker for about four hours at 210-220 degrees. While they were slow cooking they were also getting hit with a healthy (perfect) dose of cherry smoke for an unmatched, delicious flavor.

Once the ribs had finished their tour in the smoker, it was time for the infamous "Texas Crutch". This is when you wrap the ribs in aluminum and fill the pouch with apple juice. They sat in that on the grill over low heat for two more hours which is plenty of time to help the meat pull back off of the bone and render the connective tissue insuring maximum tenderness. We finished them off with BCQ's Sweet-N-Sticky glaze over medium heat on the grill. Once it was all said and done, we had some beautiful, smokey, moist and delicious baby back ribs!

There are a few things we would like to have done differently, like packing extra tables and aprons but that comes with experience. The main thing is that we made some AWARD WINNING BBQ and we had a great time doing it.

Hats off to all the other teams that competed! You all did great.

Smoke 'em if you got 'em!

Mr. Cool Lo Brown
1/2 of BCQ Competition BBQ Team.

Benihana's

2009-04-20T08:58:00.000-07:00

Last Friday Cool-lo and I had a business meeting at Benihana's in SLC (thanks Rudi). The food was fantastic however i was forced to write the following letter to management (its what I do).

Dear Mr. Benihana,

The guy you had dancing around and cooking our food was a freak. First off, he was just plain dirty in every sense of the word. The guy clearly had not brushed his teeth in quite some time. I could see the residue on his teeth, next to the whole left from the crack pipe or cigarette he has been smoking for the last 10 years. This guy is the face of Benihana, come on get him on the dental plan!

As if that wasn't bad enough he had the word, "MAXIM" tatoo'd on his right forearm. I'm not sure what that means exactly, his favorite magazine, I don't know.

To make matters worse you allowed some guy with the most annoying laugh on the planet to sit at our table. Everytime this guys spoke he would start with a loud throat clearing that transitioned into a high pitched half laugh. These kind of people should not be allowed in your eating establishment.

But the food was good, I had the lunch boat which was both tasty and filling.

Thank you

Concerned Consumer - Derek Jones

I don't want to lose you tonight

2009-03-27T07:57:00.000-07:00

They finally made my favorite song into a music video. Check it out.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IO2oayC54dg&feature=related

Function or Form?

2009-03-25T15:14:00.000-07:00

Now that both of the people that have read my previous post have had time to think about Dr. Seuss and those crazy buildings he used to draw, I’d like to ask you: Do you think those buildings would be practical and functional in this world? Probably not.

I was talking about the current state of the Republican Party in this country with a buddy of mine and he asked me a question that I haven’t been able to stop thinking about; “What comes first – Function or Form?”

Instinctively, my answer was that function should precede form (thinking in terms of my industry – engineering/design). After all, what good is a beautiful building or piece of equipment if the design that it originated from failed to consider the necessary function?

Still confused, I asked my friend to tell me where he was coming from with regards to the question.

He began by talking about the embarrassment Republicans were recently subjected to during the elections (both on the Federal and State levels). We talked about candidates that we thought should have received nominations during the primaries. It was agreed that there seemed to be true "Republican" candidates in contention for their party’s nomination during the primaries, but failed to receive the nod. Why were they beaten out by opponents with a less "Republican" record? Why were they beaten out by opponents that may have just seemed more “appealing” on a superficial level?

He made the case that in today’s political atmosphere, it seems more important to look “cool” instead of having the experience and ability to perform any necessary function while in office.

Is that where we have found ourselves currently? Has the “Reality Show” mentality overcome our sense of responsibility? Are we more worried about an outward appearance over ability to function? Are we living in a Dr. Seuss book?!

I’m going to leave this open for any discussion/comments for the time being. Do you agree? I don’t think that there is much debate over the function and form issue. I think the question comes in as it pertains to today’s political atmosphere.

Mr. Cool-Lo Brown

No tip for you!

2009-03-25T13:29:00.001-07:00

Over the next few weeks I will be sharing letters written to people or individuals that irritate, upset, or piss me off. It should be therapeutic and hopefully somewhat entertaining.

Dear Bajio of Jordan Landing,

What the hell makes you think that you deserve a tip. All you did was ask me if i wanted black or pinto beans and then slap me down a half ass burrito. Why on earth do you have a huge ass aquarium sized tip bowl on the counter and why the hell are people putting money in it(I realize I just answered my own question). Secondly you have the audacity to print a space for a tip on my credit card receipt. Stop it!

Generally speaking the following actions merit some type of gratuity(upon reading this you will realize that you do none of these).

1. Bring me my food. You couldn't do this if you wanted to. First your business model prevents this and second the tip aquarium is too big to get around. No tip for you!
2. Fill up my drink. I had to get up and step away from a intellectually stimulating conversation with Cool-lo Brown and fill up my own soda. No tip for you!
3. Be friendly. I don't recall any words being spoken by your staff other than black or pinto beans( i chose black in case you where wondering).
4. Use words I can understand.
6. Pick up after me

So as you can see you get no tip. Thank you for your understanding and have a nice day.

Derek Jones

Midnight star - No Parking on the Dance Floor

2009-03-21T13:10:00.000-07:00

A friend of mine reminded me of this video today. Take a minute and check it out.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_Uj1u86lrE

Do You Ever Feel Like You're Living In A Dr. Seuss Book?

2009-03-17T13:46:00.000-07:00

Remember those oddball buildings that Dr. Seuss used to draw and put in his books? You know the ones I’m talking about! They were leaning in every direction imaginable and were being held up by a single, little stick. Although those buildings are fantastic to look at, we all know that they're completely impossible in this world.

After thinking about those pictures, look around and ask yourself this:

Do you ever feel like you’re living in a Dr. Seuss book?

More to come….

Mr. Cool-Lo Brown

Just be yourself

2009-03-08T20:26:00.001-07:00

A few random thoughts from my upcoming book.

“He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away.” – Raymond Hull

I just got done reading Jay Mathew’s Work Hard. Be Nice. Mathews follows the lives of educational geniuses, Dave Levin and Mike Feinburg. The two are responsible for the Knowledge is Power Program KIPP and for revolutionizing low-income and at risk student education. During a particularly discouraging time the two share the following self-realization: “We were trying too hard to be what we thought teachers should be and not trying hard enough to be ourselves.” Levin and Feinburg have since gone on to re-write the book on education in American and have started over 80 Knowledge is Power Program schools across the nation.

Everyone has different back grounds, upbringings and perspectives. Some are rich some are poor, and yes, some are stupid. Regardless of what our background is we should be proud of who we are, and proud of what we have accomplished.

I grow weary of seeing people change themselves in order to meet the acceptance of others. In a typical workplace or office there are generally a few people whose egos are fed daily by butt kissers, brown noser’s or worse, people who denounce their personal beliefs hoping to be accepted by someone higher than them on the food chain. Such acceptance is temporary and is far outweighed by the long term satisfaction that comes from being true to yourself.

Being true to yourself means to be true to the very best that is in you. Not what you think the best is in someone else. ..

Seigfried's German Deli

2009-03-06T11:48:00.000-08:00

I thought I'd add a little review on a local joint which I ate at today:

I went down the street for lunch today. Went to a little place called Seigfried's (Located just west of Main St. on 200 South) and it didn't just fill my belly. It blew my mind!

All I had in mind to eat was a bratwurst but I ended up buying the pork steak and bratwurst with some fried potatoes as a side dish. Simply amazing and I got all that for $8 and change.

I'd say the only draw back to eating there for lunch (at least during a work day) is the lunch coma that you want to fall in to once you get back to your office. I have a sneaking suspicion that I'm not going to be getting much work done for the rest of the day.

Mr. Cool-Lo Brown